Wow! What a lot of “things” are going on in this world right now. If you watch the news at all, it’s not good news for anyone.

Often, when I’m surrounded by negativity, I lament, then I think, “But what can I do?”

And it hit me, that the best thing we can do when everything seems so dark, is to be a light right where you are.

Jesus was giving the Sermon on the Mount and telling people how to live, and following that, he said this:

“You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven. (Matthew 5:14-16)

What does that mean? “Let your light shine before others...”

Maybe it means something like this:

— Taking flowers to your Jewish neighbor and telling her you are praying for Israel

— Responding with encouragement rather than an eye roll when your pickleball partner hits a shot out…again!

— Asking your teenager for forgiveness after snapping at him on the way to school *Ask me how I know about this!

— Making dinner for the millionth time, even though you don’t want to

— Running errands for your friend undergoing chemotherapy

— Getting together with other friends to pray for our families and this crazy world

— Taking time to have a nice conversation with the check-out clerk at Trader Joes

— Going the speed limit and letting that person merge into your lane right in front of you

You see, these aren’t big things. In fact, some of them are pretty small. But to me, when we live like this, we are being a light right where we are.

We aren’t waiting for some grand gesture.

We aren’t headed to our local campus to get in a kerfuffle with the protestors. (Although some of you may feel called to participate.)

But we are, in the nitty-gritty of life, loving our neighbor well.

And I think that’s being a light.

And that light brings hope to a dark and pain-filled world.

I hope this sparked something positive in you. And that you will be encouraged to let your light shine, no matter where you are.

Love you and cheering you on,

Christy

P.S. If you’re looking for a fun Mother’s Day gift, why not give your favorite pickleball-loving mom, my ​Pickleball Devotional​ or ​World of Pickleball​ Word Search? You can click ​here​ and ​here​ to find out more. xoxoxo

The post What You CAN Do appeared first on Christy Largent.

It’s one of those miraculous spring days here in Texas with the sun shining in a cloudless sky, the air cool and perfectly warm, with just a hint of a light breeze wafting around your body… (ahhhhhhh.)

And it’s just that “Ahhhhhh” feeling I want to discuss with you today. That “Ahhhhhh” can easily turn into “Awe” and when it does, we’ll be all the better for it.

Psychologists tell us that cultivating wonder and awe are two ways we can all be just a little bit happier. Plus, living in awe and wonder helps us to take our eyes off ourselves, turn our attention outward, and even increase our creativity.

As you can imagine, allowing for space to find that wonder and awe can be a bit difficult in our crazy, overwhelming world.

Thankfully, you don’t have to go on a mountain adventure in Colorado to experience awe. (Although that would be wonderful too!)

It’s finding the wonder and awe in every day that helps you as you go through life.

Don’t wait for the grand moment, instead, you can seek them out little by little:

–While you’re driving in traffic, turn on a classical station and lose yourself in the mystery and magic of music

–When you walk outside to pick up the morning paper, slow yourself to look up into the sky, breathe in deeply, savor the fresh green all around you, and say thank you to a God who gives us all things lavishly.

–The next time you see a soft, round baby in the cart at the grocery store, don’t just rush on by, but stop and smile at that baby. Smile at the Mama and speak a blessing on that sweet family.

And that’s the beauty of it. Wonder and awe are all around us just waiting to be discovered…

Even these little things will bring you wonder and awe.

All of them are reminding you there are so many things much bigger than yourself.

And that’s a great starting point for enriching your life and helping you enjoy life more.

Until next week, remember, as always, I’m

Cheering you on,

Christy

P.S. If you’re anywhere near the path of the total eclipse heading our way next Monday, I’d encourage you to take a break, get some ​eclipse glasses​, and go outside to experience the wonder and awe of this amazing world in action!

P.P.S. If this conversation about wonder is interesting to you, you’ll want to check out ​this new book ​by Philosopher Helen De Cruz. She does a really good job of discussing the transformative role of wonder and awe in this uncertain world.

The post Finding Your Wonder and Awe appeared first on Christy Largent.

Happy Monday from sunny Texas. My 16-year-old is off on a school mission trip to Greece, and my sweet 20-year-old is covering the amazing South by Southwest (SXSW) festival in Austin for her newspaper (The Daily Texan), so Tom and I are enjoying an unusually empty nest this week…changes all around!

It’s March! March Madness is just around the corner and my thoughts go back to watching my college Basketball team. Do you remember the excitement of a close game? Back and forth the score went…up by 3, then up by 6, then down by 4, then back up…it was so exciting!

And then in the final seconds, with just 2 points separating the score, your school’s favorite player grabs the ball, races down the court, stops at the top of the key, sets himself, lifts his arms and lets fly the most perfect net-swishing 3-pointer and the game is yours!

You scream and jump and laugh and hug your friends and scream some more. Your body is suffused with happiness and good feelings! Your energy is off the charts and you, along with all your friends surge forward as one, racing onto the gym floor to celebrate together.

Ahhhhhh – deep breath. It’s so fun reliving that moment in my mind.

And this, my friend, is the magic of fully experiencing your feelings. Your body becomes fully alive and you are completely immersed in the sensations generated by your thoughts.

Hmmmm. So what does that example have to do with your life today?

Just as powerful as your thoughts and feelings were back in college, they are the same today.

You think about all you have to do, and you’re suddenly so tired you can’t move.

You think about the last “discussion” (ahem) you had with your spouse, and you can literally feel your blood pressure rising.

You think about the odd comment the mammogram technician said to you this morning when you got your annual mammogram, and your breathing suddenly becomes shallower and your chest tight.

The key in all these examples is how powerful our thoughts are. And how quickly our body will respond.

So if you’re struggling with low energy, apathy, or lack of motivation, I suggest you might want to take a look at what you are spending your time thinking about.

Because when we habitually think difficult thoughts, or maybe we shut those difficult thoughts and feelings down with buffering behavior like eating, drinking, shopping or gossiping, we are shutting down the energy flow.

Just like the energy flow of positive thoughts is overwhelming and all-consuming and like a supercharge to your system, the effort it takes to stop and block the difficult feelings is like a huge, heavy, wet blanket for your energy.

So the next time you’re feeling sluggish, try these quick fixes:

–Step outside and walk 50 steps in either direction…bonus if you move your arms and clap your hands and smile at the sky. Think about the beauty all around and the gratitude you have for being able to move.

–Stand up from your desk, take a deep breath in, lift your arms and eyes to the ceiling, smile big, and say “thank you” out loud…then let the air out, drop your arms, and repeat several times.

These simple physical movements can refill your energy tank and get you back on track.

Then, the next time you feel yourself wanting to go eat, (my issue), drink, scroll, shop, or whatever your buffering actions are:

–Sit still, take a few breaths, and look deep to see what feeling is actually happening inside. I feel my difficult feelings in my chest and am often overwhelmed with the need to get up from my desk and head into the kitchen when I feel an uncomfortable one…I’m working on sitting still to actually identify what the feelings are.

–Then take another deep breath, let the difficult feelings flow and write down the name of the feeling and the sensations I’m experiencing. Shortness of breath, tight chest, upset stomach, buzzing in my ears…how do your difficult feelings present? There’s almost always a physical sensation to match them all.

–Sit still a moment longer…and often you’ll discover that once you let yourself actually feel the emotion and you identify the physical experience of that emotion, you can be curious about the sensation, and soon the emotion is actually gone.

You didn’t die. Nothing really happened except you allowed the emotion, experienced the emotion, and then moved on.

If you regularly allow yourself to do this exercise, you’ll learn a lot about how your body responds to emotion.

You’ll discover what thoughts generate the various feelings you have, and you’ll learn to notice when your body is telling you something your mind hadn’t even registered.

It’s fascinating, isn’t it?

I hope these little suggestions are helpful for you. The world needs you at your maximum energy output! So put these into practice and let me know how it goes.

Love you and Cheering you on!

Christy

The post How to Find More Energy appeared first on Christy Largent.

Let me start with a question…

Did you know that your brain will find exactly what it expects to find?

Or put another way, did you know you get exactly what you think about.

So often in life, without even knowing it, we find ourselves creating just the future we don’t want.

For example, (and this is a silly example) I say, “I always get all the green lights.” My husband says, “I seem to always hit the reds.”

And guess what? I do get the greens, and he does get the reds.

But the truth of the matter is, statistically, we both get around the same amount—ish…

And even though statistically we should get the same, it doesn’t seem that way at all.

Because I notice when I get the greens. Just this week, on the way to school dropoff, I’ve gotten almost all greens 2 different mornings!

I think I perceive I get more greens because I NOTICE the greens. And I comment on getting the greens. And I do a little happy jig in my seat when I get the greens. And I look for the opportunity to get the greens. And when I get the reds, I almost always say, “That’s strange, I usually get the greens, or “I’ll bet getting this red is keeping me from something horrible if I had gotten the green.” (Reframing!)

Do you see how this silly little example plays out over and over in our lives?

We get what we’re looking for. And whether we actually do get it or not, our perception and our expectation is that we will get it, therefore, regardless if it’s an actuality or not, we enjoy the positive expectation and personal reality that we “get the greens.”

Our brains are wonderful gifts from God. They work like homing pigeons looking for what we program them with.

I’ve programmed my mind to look for the greens.

And I’ve programmed it to look for beauty.

And I’ve programmed it to look for lots and lots of good in everything. (Even when bad things happen.)

So because I’m looking for all this good, I’m so much happier and more optimistic in my life.

You know it works the other way too…when you look for and expect the worst, you will get it.

What do you want?

Do you want to get the best?

Or do you want to set yourself up for the worst?

The good news is that you get to choose! You get to decide if you will program your brain for “the greens” or “the reds.”

If you need a little help with this, may I recommend (ahem) my new book, ​Dink Positive Thoughts​. Even though it’s written for Pickleball players, it will help you retrain your brain to look for the good and think positive thoughts in your daily life. You can order your copy by ​clicking​ ​here​.

And if you have already gotten the book, THANK YOU!!!, and please, please take a quick minute and ​leave a review.​ It would mean so much to me since Amazon gives priority to showing books that are selling and that are getting reviews…so thanks in advance!

Love you and cheering you on,

Christy

P.S. ​Here’s that link​ to either order the book, or leave a review. Again, THANK YOU so much!!!

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This week I’ve been head down and digging deep to make progress on the gift book/devotional I’m writing.

It’s centered around how we can live out the Fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23…love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control.)

The plan is to get the devotional up and available for purchase on Amazon by mid-November. (Just in time for holiday sales!)

This is a devotional for Pickleball players who want to do better managing their mind. It’s called “Dink Positive Thoughts.” (A dink is a foundational shot you hit in Pickleball.) Each short devotional will have a verse, commentary, a prayer and an affirmation to practice.

In light of everything that has been happening in the world this past week, I wanted to share one of the devotionals I wrote with you.

Right now I feel somewhat helpless in the face of all this world strife.

But one thing I know is that we have a God who cares. Who loves the people of Israel. And loves us too.

So even though the following devotion is focused on Pickleball players, I want you to think about the ideas I’m sharing and see how you can apply them in your own life – whether you are a Pickleball player or not!

——————————————-

Love – 1 Peter 4:8 TLB

“Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love makes up for many of your faults.”

***

Most important of all…show deep love. This is so easy to say, yet can be so difficult to do. Especially when we are out on the courts. Our partner makes some dumb shots, they mistakenly call an out ball in, or they hog the whole court leaving you feeling left out.

I don’t know about you, but when people act in “human” ways, I often want to scream. And act snotty. And get an attitude.

Instead, the next time we are tempted to get irritated with our partner, do the opposite. Speak words of encouragement. Cheer their good shots. Physically, turn towards them at the end of the point rather than away from them.

In this way you will be putting love in action…and making up for many faults.

***

Prayer: Lord, help me to be your light shining love on the court (and in this world) regardless of the situation. Let me love like Jesus today.

***

Affirmation: Today I will look for and find ways to show love in action. I will shine the light of Jesus on the Pickleball courts and in my community.

———————————–

Dear one – know you are loved and prayed for. I appreciate you and am so thankful you are reading this. If I can be of any help or encouragement to you today, just leave a comment and let me know.

Cheering you on,

Christy

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I just got back from the gym and am heading down to Houston later this morning. It’s been a whirlwind!

Today’s image is a shot from my trip to Atlanta and the MLP (Major League Pickleball) event.

I had the BEST time, and I’m so glad I was able to make the trip. Not only did I get to watch the best Pickleball players in the world, but I also signed up for a 3-day clinic given by Teaching Pro Mark Price.

Even though it was tiring driving 90 minutes north to the 3-hour clinic after a full day watching the pros, it was actually such a blessing to be able to learn skills that I had just seen the pros using, so that I could continue working to improve my own game.

And that’s what I want to share with you today.

This morning, as I was at the gym working through my workout, I realized that after 6 weeks, I’m getting stronger and more flexible.

I signed up with my coach, Connor Derrickson, mid-August, and every day I’ve been doing just a little bit more.

It’s not groundbreaking for sure, and it’s pretty tame compared to what I could do in my 20’s and 30’s…but I turn 60 next month, and I’m pretty happy with my progress.

What’s the lesson here?

That just a little bit every day will work wonders.

It’s not overnight.

It’s not all that impressive either.

But over time, it’s tiny, incremental progress forward.

And my friend, I think that’s what will get us all where we want to be.

I didn’t get stiff, overweight, and weak overnight. It was also tiny, incremental movement (backward) over time.

And now, and am experiencing the same only in a positive direction.

So whether it’s a physical goal – like mine is improving my rating and pickleball skills with a stronger, more physically fit body, or something professional – thinking of going for that promotion?, or relational – maybe taking that trip with your loved one, they all have the common denominator that you’ll get there one tiny step at a time.

Hope this has inspired you in some area. If it has, leave a comment and let me know. I’d love to hear all about it!

Love you and Cheering you on,

Christy

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It’s a beautiful sunny, cool day and we are having a great time visiting before I head up to Peachtree Corners for the Major League Pickleball Event. (I’m not playing – heehee) but I’m such a super fan, I’m going to be courtside to see all the top Pro players in the PB world. (There really is such a thing!)

Anyway, Monday back in Texas as I was coming home from taking Graham to school, I was thinking…”What could I do today that would allow me to really relax and enjoy my week in Georgia?”

And what immediately came to mind was to finish, and turn in my book proposal.

Since last May, I’ve been saying I would send a book proposal into a publisher (who requested it!) and yet for some reason, I’ve procrastinated. I’ve worked on it partially, I’ve moved forward in fits and starts, but I just couldn’t get myself to finish the darn thing and send it in!

So I knew I needed to just finish it and get it done!

(Have you ever had something like that?)

So I’m happy to report that by Monday at 3:00pm I had finished and submitted it to the publisher, along with submitting it on a major site that many publishers and agents use to find new manuscripts.

Whew! That felt sooooo goood!!

As I flew out yesterday, I was so thankful I had found my “around to it” to get to.

Really, the victory was in finishing the promised project more than the actual project itself.

As I was mulling over what had held me back for so long, the biggest obstacle that came to mind was this…

Perfection coupled with fear.

Fear it wasn’t, or wouldn’t be, perfect enough.

And if I never sent it, I would never know, right?

So theoretically, I was living in fear of something that wasn’t even real.

I mean, there is no actual downside.

“What if she says no?”

So what? What if she says no?

I don’t change either way. If she says no, then that’s ok, I can find other publishing houses, and/or publish it myself.

So really, there’s no downside.

And the exercise of completing the project was the victory in itself.

What have you been procrastinating on? Are you ready to “get ‘er done” as Larry the Cable Guy says?

This is what I did: (and maybe this will help you too!)

–I set the timer (20 minute chunks of work at a time)

–I focused on the process. There were lots of parts to this proposal, so I just focused on each part – writing, reviewing and editing. One element at a time.

–I hit send. Once the proposal was complete, I was actually second guessing myself – wondering if I should have someone else look at it and “approve” of what I had written. Then I caught myself. That was just another form of procrastination! So I gathered my courage, said a little prayer of gratitude and hit send.

Many years ago I heard the business and marketing strategist Seth Godin coin the term “Just ship it” as an anecdote to perfection paralysis, and I thought it was very useful.

And Monday I found it useful as well, as hitting the send button was a little “Just ship it” to myself.

And hopefully my encouragement to you to “Just Ship It” will help you as well.

Cheering you on,

Christy

P.S. If finding a life coach is something you’ve been procrastinating on, I have the perfect opportunity for you! My coach, Edie Wadsworth, is holding a 3-day “Live Your Life Purpose Challenge” event this week, and you can still get in on all the goodness. Here’s a link to check it out.

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I could see this as a disaster, imagine they are trying to “rip me off,” or get angry that this is the recommendation on a relatively new car.

Or, I could see this as an opportunity to explore my options.

That’s what I did, and the jury’s still out, so I don’t know what I’m going to do, but I know I’ll have a good way of framing my choice.

Because I’ve learned that how you think about things changes everything!

This week I started on a nutrition challenge, and one of the requirements is that I track everything I put in my mouth with the “My Fitness Pal.”

Now this is not the first time I’ve attempted to track my food. And always before, I’ve had a couple of these thoughts:

“I’m not a detail person, and I don’t like having to deal with all the specifics.”

and

“I hate tracking my food – it’s just too difficult.”

or the best of all..

“I don’t have time to track what I’m eating.”

So this week, I knew something had to change in order for me to be successful, because as you can imagine, the above thoughts never worked out well.

So this time, I decided I would have some different thoughts…

“I have plenty of time to track my food.”

and

“This is kind of fun, watching the numbers respond as I put in my food,”

and

“This is a cool way to make sure I’m getting all my nutrients in the appropriate amounts…kind of like a game!”

These have been the thoughts I’ve been thinking over and over.

And guess what???

Yup. It’s working!

I have a whole new perspective on tracking, and I’m beginning to see it as a really valuable tool I can use in my quest to be healthier and stronger.

And actually, as I think about this, my mental shift started a few weeks ago when I was researching “macro counting” and came across this quote from ​a blogger, ​

“Luckily, I enjoy this process of tracking and goal setting and experimenting.”

And when I read that, and thought, “Why can’t I enjoy it too?”

Why not? I’ve learned to like new things in my life before (flossing anyone?) so why not learn to like tracking and goal setting and experimenting?

That actually sounds kind of fun! (And I’m all about the FUN!)

And this experience (so far) has been very different than all the times before.

So my friend, what do you need to change your thinking about? Is there an area where you’ve been struggling that would benefit from a different way of thinking?

This works around anything…

• Your Relationships
• Your job
• Your Pickleball addiction

I’d really encourage you to go ahead and map out some new ways of thinking…it’s so worth it!

If you’re stuck, just hit reply and I’ll be happy to walk you through some options.

Because, as always, I’m cheering you on,

xo

Christy

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I thought I’d try something new today.

It’s been bugging me that my weekly emails have been so visually boring…so I decided to try something new!

I’m often stopped in my tracks by trying some new technology. While I wouldn’t call a newsletter template exactly cutting-edge technology, just the thought of trying to find one and figure it out paralyzed me for some weeks.

So this week, when I opened up my newsletter provider, I decided to try one of the provided templates.

I’ve kind of goofed up a couple times while writing it (on the backend) but here I am, making strides towards improving something that’s been bugging me for a while.

How about you – is there something that you’ve been putting off because it feels too daunting?

Here is what I told myself (self talk) before I started this with you today:

1. I reminded myself that past history tells me I’ve been willing to try new things.

2. I told myself I could figure it out, even if it took a bit of time. (Everything is “Figure-outable” – thanks Marie Forleo!)

3. I went ahead and tried even thought I wasn’t sure how it would work.

So you can use this strategy the next time you are stuck with something too.

–What does your past history tell you? (And make it something true and positive and energy giving.)

–What is the power statement that will get you going – for me, it was the reminder I’ll figure it out.

–Just start! Get moving, the momentum will really help you get going.

Your turn…I’d love you to try it, then let me know what you did that you had been stuck on!

Because, as always, I’m…

Cheering you on,

Christy

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I see the images coming across my Instagram feed and the stories filtering over my Facebook page.

Parents hugging, kissing, laughing, sorting, hauling, setting up (exquisite) dorm rooms, exploring, letting go, laughing some more, and crying.

I have 1 heading off for her second full year at UT, and to be honest, I have some really mixed emotions right now.

You see, our original college dropoff was fall of 2021 when we left our oldest as a HS senior for her to attend the Texas Academy of Math and Science up at the University of North Texas.

To be honest, I had an idealized vision of what it would be like to move her into her dorm. I’d use my background as a professional interior designer to help her create a beautiful, charming, inviting place of respite and calm amid the challenges of college.

I pictured helping her move in and get everything settled, pictures hung, lights strung, and a fuzzy throw blanket across the back of her desk chair. Kissing and hugging goodbye I’d cry on the way home, having dropped my eldest off, knowing things would never be the same again.

Well, I cried on the way home, but for a very different reason than I thought I would.

For starters, she wanted nothing to do with my vision of a fabulous dorm room. Utilitarian was her battle cry and she wanted it as sterile and stark as possible. No throw rugs, sparkle lights or beautiful art. Not for this girl.

I finally wrapped my mind around that, and at least looked forward to helping her move in with what she did let me get her.

Instead, as we got there and began unloading, she definitely didn’t want help putting her room together. I kept hovering, trying to help, but she was on a mission. Everything unpacked by herself and set up by herself.

She didn’t want any input or help from me other than taking out the trash.

In fact, she couldn’t get us out of there fast enough.

I get this. I do. This was about her, not me. But it was really tough for me.

That’s how it is with expectations. We have a vision, how it “should” be, of whatever it is…marriage, parenthood, our work, or, more specifically, moving a kid into college, the empty nest, our “retirement” years…

And for some reason, our expectations are way off base.

What do we do then?

It’s how we handle these unmet expectations that can really take our joy in life off course.

But the magic is that this is where we get to practice the skills we work on, our lovingkindness, our generosity, our patience, our trustworthiness.

During the difficult times are when those skills really count.

When we are able to manage our thoughts so they are working for us instead of against us.

When we can generate good feelings for ourselves in the midst of, let’s face it, less than perfect/desirable circumstances.

I’m so thankful that this year I have a lot more developed skills in this area than I did 2 years ago.

Now when Amelia insists on doing everything herself, I can notice her actions and if I start feeling rejected, I can recognize that it hurts, let myself sit with it until that feeling dissipates, then, I can change my thinking and think how thankful I am she’s so self-sufficient and focused on what’s most important to her.

Because when I think how grateful I am she’s confident and purposeful, I feel happy and even more grateful and hopeful for her future, which helps me be a more supportive and encouraging Mother. (Which is what I want to be!)

Oh, and I can have her Dad take her back down to college without me, which will let us all breathe a bit easier.

I know life isn’t like all those pictures I see on my social media. But going through this exercise helps me stay on track a whole lot more, and I hope it will help you too!

Love you and cheering you on,

Christy

P.S. If you’re curious about this “Think-feel-act” model I keep talking about, my coach Edie Wadsworth has opened her coaching program for a limited time. You can go here to find out more information. (Not an affiliate, just a BIG fan!)

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In the midst of all this “life” of course, I’m working on my Pickleball program (​Pickleball Evangelism​) as well as a proposal for my book, “Dink Positive Thoughts,” as well as fitting in as much Pickleball as I can while also taking care of the family.

One area I’ve also been working on specifically, as I’ve mentioned before, is adjusting my “Identity” that is, how I see myself being in this world, from a woman who not only works out and eats well but a woman who is an athlete.

And becoming that person, my future self, if you will, is taking some effort and thought work.

At 5:30 this morning as I was driving to my Pickleball lesson, I was listening to a really cool ​podcast​, with a neuroscientist and a psychology professor and they were talking about why we are so darn mean to our future selves. ​Here’s a link ​if you’re interested.

The fascinating thing is that almost all of us do this because of how we see our future self.

I won’t get into all they discussed, but the one thing that stuck out is that basically, when I make a decision that harms my future self (deciding to eat a 1/2 carton of ice cream for example, or at least that’s what I’ve heard some people might choose…ahem) we’re making that decision because the part of our brain working right then, sees our future self as a stranger, and when we see people as strangers, we have less empathy and we care less about them and we are less likely to make a decision in their favor.

Ouch!

Thankfully they gave a few examples of ways we can be kinder and make better decisions for our future self.

1. Make it more personal by changing the pronouns we use for our future self – ie., from “Christy” or “she” to “me’ and “I” which will help us bring it to a more personal level and to a better part of our brain resulting in a better decision.

2. If you find yourself saying yes to things in the future because you’re so busy right now, but then when you get to the future and you’re mad at yourself for saying yes because you’re just as busy then as you are now…instead of saying yes in the first place, go ahead and accept that although you might be uncomfortable and awkward declining now, you’ll be so much happier in the future, when you are free from that undesired commitment.

3. Be more willing to acknowledge and notice the feelings that arise now, rather than push them off until later. And be ok to actually sit with and process the feelings now, then let them pass, even though it’s a bit tougher now.

Creating a future self that is who you want to be is not for the faint of heart!

(For me at least) it takes a lot of work and attention.

But she is worth it. My future self is cheering me on, and yours is cheering you on as well.

Let me know what you think of the podcast. Do you struggle with making the best decisions possible for your future self? What works best for helping you make good choices? Leave a comment and let me know.

Cheering you on my friend!

c

The post Your Future Self Will Thank You appeared first on Christy Largent.

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I was pretty clueless about it until I happened to be invited to a special workshop intensive on how businesses are using it with great success.

Intrigued, I attended the workshop and was absolutely blown away by the possibilities Ai and ChatGPT provide.

Interestingly, when I asked my kids about it, they were (per usual) way ahead of me and gave me many examples of how kids in HS and College are using it. (Some good, some not so good!)

I’m actually in LOVE with it! I can take something I’ve written, put it in, and it will give me an improved version. So in other words, Ai (I call her “Chatty” which drives my kids wild!) will help you be a better version of yourself.

Let me show you how it works using the above paragraph for demonstration:

This is what I put in:

“Please rewrite this to make it better, still with my happy, positive tone of voice. “I’m actually in LOVE with it! I can take something I’ve written, put it in, and it will give me an improved version. So in other words, Ai (I call her “Chatty” which drives my kids wild!) will help you be a better version of yourself.”

And this is what she gave me back:

“I absolutely adore it! It’s incredible how I can input my writing and it will provide me with a polished version. It’s like having a personal writing assistant! I affectionately refer to the AI as “Chatty,” which always gets a reaction from my kids. With this amazing tool, you can enhance your writing and become an even better version of yourself.”

See how awesome she makes me sound? Now to tell you the truth, I would probably take what she gave me (in about 2 seconds I might add) and rework it to make it mine…well, let me show you.

My revised version:

“I’m actually in love with it! It’s incredible how I can input my writing and it will provide me with a polished version. It’s like having a personal writing assistant! I affectionately refer to the AI as “Chatty,” which drives my kids wild. With this amazing tool, you can enhance your writing and become an even better version of yourself.”

That’s so crazy, right?

She can also help you create a schedule, organize your time, plan your meals, and even work out vacation details.

Go to www.chat.openai.com you will see what I’m talking about.

Well, actually, what you’re going to see is a blank screen with a single open prompt line.

Here’s the catch. Chatty gives you NOTHING until you give her something.

She’s super smart…think Google on steroids…but she can’t do anything until you tell her which direction to head.

Just like our minds. We have to feed it the really good stuff, tell it what to think, thoughts that will serve us so that we will get the feelings and output we want. We really are a supercomputer designed by God to do great things.

But for today and our Ai discussion, if you want to get more details on it, I really like this woman who has put together all kinds of tutorials and helps on making the most of ChatGPT. She explains everything so well!

Even if this isn’t your thing at all, I’d encourage you to find something new to try. Whether it’s Pickleball (of course!) or crochet or a new recipe, get your brain moving and juices flowing by trying new things. I think you’ll be so glad you did!

Cheering you on!

Christy

The post Are You Trying New Things? appeared first on Christy Largent.

Speaking of waiting, today I want to talk with you a bit about the big P – Procrastination.

Some of us never struggle with it.

I think of my kids, who hate to procrastinate and like to get everything finished early, so they are not stressed out. I remember when Amelia was in grade school, she was questioning me about getting her the supplies she needed to start a project. I asked when the project was due (thinking maybe a couple of days away,) imagine my surprise when I learned it was due 4 weeks out! She hates to procrastinate!

Alas, her Mother is not like that. In the past, I’ve been a Procrastination Queen. In high school and college, I was the one working through the night before and into the morning of on a paper or project coming due that day.

I have a speaker friend who put it this way…”Christy, I feel like I’m always performing a rough draft. I wait until it’s too late to practice, and then just get up and pull it off, but I know I’m not doing as well as I could be doing.”

Do you ever feel like that?

As we get older, the concept of time becomes even more dear. When we were 30, I’ll bet most of us rarely thought of “how much time we had left.”

But as I’m getting closer to 60, I’m acutely aware of potentially how my days are numbered.

Thankfully, I have long-lived ancestors, but you just never know, right? For any of us, today could be our last.

So I think it’s super important we get a handle on this procrastination thing. So that we live our life making the most of our gifts and talents.

I’ve been working on it and a few things have helped me that might help you too:

At the beginning of the month, write down a master list of what is coming due, what you want to accomplish, and so on. You can use it as a mind dump of all that’s on your heart.

Then go through and pull out what absolutely needs to be done. Maybe move some things to the following month, or months out. Once you get in the habit of this, you can take things that are further out, and stay on top of each of them ahead of time.

For example, if you’re going on a trip in October, there are a lot of moving parts to make that trip come together. You’ve got flights, hotels, excursions, etc. If you wait until September to start thinking about it, then you’ll pay more, be stressed and probably not get all you want out of your vacation.

But if you break it into parts, and add each appropriate part onto your monthly calendar, you’ll be able to get everything accomplished in plenty of time to think, research, think some more, schedule, and then fully enjoy your trip.

I give you this fun example because if you have a habit of Procrastination, then you might procrastinate on the fun as well as the not so fun.

I’ve also found I have had to change the way I think. (Sound familiar?)

Instead of thinking and saying, “I’m a procrastinator,” or “I’m always a day late and a dollar short,” I think “There’s plenty of time to get done what needs to get done,” and “I love getting things done in an unhurried and relaxed manner.”

I think these thoughts and write them down in my planner. And it’s helping.

I sometimes still Procrastinate. But changing my thinking, and doing the simple hack of “calendaring” my activities has really helped me a lot, and I hope it helps you too.

I hope you have a great week! Remember…

I’m cheering you on!

xo

Christy

P.S. I got my bargain value Cold Plunge yesterday! It’s like a glorified pool float with a simple PVC pipe structure, but I’m going to try it today and see how I do. I discovered our cold water here in Texas is only around 65 degrees, and the health benefits of cold water therapy start at 60, so it should be interesting!

The post Overcoming the Dreaded “P” Word appeared first on Christy Largent.

This morning I snuck over to the local Pickleball courts and had several hours of Pickleball play with some new friends.

I have a long “to do” list, but instead of chaining myself to my desk to get it done, I threw on some (warm) sweats and headed out into the chill for some exercise and fellowship.

As I was playing, I hit as many losers as winners. I ran cross court and jumped up in the air for shots, channeling my inner Michael Jordan (I was at least 2″ off the courts!) and I laughed too many times to count.

When I headed home, sweaty and with my emotional tank full to the brim, I knew I would have a productive day ahead.

That’s because, as you well know, Pickleball has quickly become a new passion for me.

And when we make time for our passions, suddenly our other available time grows almost exponentially.

Once I was home, instead of sitting at my desk, struggling to find the words, instead I’m struggling to type fast enough to get the words out.

Instead of worrying about how I’m going to finish the Christmas decorating that’s been laying around 1/2 finished, I whipped out the mantle and cleared up the stragglers in about 15 minutes!

That’s what happens when your tank is full.

So this is my question for you.

What fills your tank?

What’s your passion that makes your heart sing? (At least for right now – Lord knows they change over time), but for today, what is it?

In my course that’s coming out in January, I’ll be doing a deep dive into how to find your passions. Because, let’s face it, between laundry, carpool and work demands, we midlife women often lose our sense of what we absolutely love.

A Simple Exercise

Finding your passions in midlife can be life challenging. But it is key to living your most fulfilled life.

For today, here’s a quick exercise you can try to clarify your passions:

Set the timer for 5 minutes.

Then, I want you to think back when you were between 10 and 16 years old.

What did you love to do? What were you good at and what did you enjoy doing? Which activities took up the most of your time?

Using a pen and paper, write down a list. Sometimes, as you start writing, more and more will come to mind. Write it all down.

Then look over that list and see if there are any common denominators. If so, pull them out.

And ask yourself if any of those things are things you would be interested in doing right now.

They may look different now. For example, when I was that age, I did basketball, swimming, diving, softball, rugby (I know!), cross country, cheerleading, volleyball and tennis. The common denominator was that I played team sports. I liked being on a team and I liked competing in athletics.

Today, I channel that desire onto the Pickleball court rather than all the other sports, and even though it’s a different sport, it’s filling that desire (Passion) right up to the top.

Now It’s Your Turn…

Now you can think about finding your own passions in midlife. And how you can add them into your life right now.

Because one thing I know for sure – this world needs YOU alight with your passion light shining.

Cheering you on,

Christy

The post The Point of Your Passions appeared first on Christy Largent.

I get regular updates from The Center for Brain Health.

And one of their recent updates clarified something that for years, I had a sneaking suspicion about.

And that is the reality that the more we fill our minds with information, the slower and less effectively our minds are able to work.

In fact, the more we stuff our brain, rather than becoming empowered, we end up with:

–Shallower thinking

–Less logical thinking abilities

and

–An increase in poor decision making.

All of which we don’t want right now!

So instead, as you’re feeling overwhelmed, sad and probably frustrated, what will be more helpful is to limit and manage what you’re taking in.

I mean, I know Netflix is calling for your next binge-watch, but how do you feel after you’ve spent 8 hours watching? At least, that’s what I’ve heard some people do… (ahem)

Instead, try these 3 tips:

1. Limit your exposure to the news. Rather than gorge on hours upon hours (and I know how easy that can be!) set a time that you will get your updates, and other than that, turn it off.

2. Be intentional with putting in uplifting and encouraging information, as well as taking time to just let your mind wander. Read a good book, or find a new cooking blog, or be inspired with a gardening channel. Any, or all, of these will lift you up and allow your brain to refresh, all without adding stress. A long walk in the early morning, or late afternoon is one of my favorite things to let myself have time to “reboot.” More of this please.

3. Finally, try to limit your discussions about Covid-19 and what’s happening right now. It’s too easy to make this current situation your sole focus – which spreads from Facetime chats to your dinner table conversation. Instead, talk about what you’re looking forward to after this is all over. The scientists tell us that when you train your brain to look forward with anticipation, (possibility thinking) you actually become more resourceful and flexible, and we all can use more of that.

Question: What are some of the things you use to help you stay in a positive frame of mind?

The post Eliminate to Improve appeared first on Christy Largent.

Sound familiar? It’s really hard to stay positive when you’ve got anxiety beating down your door – even when you’re trying to sleep!

So I want to give you a few suggestions I have found to be helpful, even when you’re dragging.

“Look at something that makes you smile”

When you wake up anxious and beat down, look at something that makes you smile right away. Maybe that’s a picture of your child or grandchild. Or of a favorite holiday when you all laughed and laughed. Or maybe it’s your silly dog who just jumped up on your bed, tail wagging and trying to lick your face.

Use a physical cue to turn your mind to a happy place. As you look at that picture or hug your dog, take just 30 seconds and enjoy the moment. Take a deep breath and think about that happy vacation or how warm and soft your dog is. As my 10-year-old son says, “Savor the moment, Mama!”

“Take time to be grateful for this”

Using the energy of those happy thoughts, the next step is to start being grateful for this positive thing in your life. You can say it out loud or just to yourself. It might sound something like this…

“Thank you for this sweet dog who makes me laugh. Thank you for her soft fur. Thank you I get to hug her and snuggle her close this morning. Thank you that I have money to take care of her and buy her food. Thank you that she brings me joy.”

I must warn you that what invariably happens is that right about now your anxious thoughts will try to intrude. Our mind is crazy like that.…lost in the moment with your sweet dog, you suddenly start thinking about that horrible employee who is causing all kinds of problems with your team.

So when that person comes to mind, instead of jumping into anxiety about the strife she brings, just picture her. Then control the thought about her intentionally, turning it to gratitude. 

It might sound like this…

“Wow. Carley. Hmm…Thank you for Carley. Thank you for the way working with her is allowing me to learn and grow. Thank you that I get to figure out how to either get her back on track or let her go for career redirection. Thank you that I’m capable and know how to either work through this or get help to work through this…Thank you for my job that lets me use my skills and talents. Thank you that I get to have so many awesome people on my team. And as difficult as Carley is, she just shows me how fortunate I am to have so many other great employees. I’m confident I can handle this today.”

Just writing that made me feel better!

“Repeat as needed”

Repeat as needed throughout the day. During difficult times, I know anxious thoughts are never far away. And when they overwhelm, I find we often allow ourselves to obsess on all the possible things that could/would/might go wrong and it becomes a negative spiral that never ends. It just gets darker and deeper.

That’s why it’s so important to recognize that you can have the victory and find the positive if you choose to. These simple steps…Observe, Give Thanks, Repeat will help you do that.

Have you tried to turn your anxiety around to find the positive? If so, what works for you? Let me know as I’d love to hear your solution.

The post Simple Steps to Turn Anxiety into Positivity appeared first on Christy Largent.